…Taco Bell not ready for Port Angeles.

Yes.  In theory I’d like to exclusively hit unique local restaurants, but for less than two bucks I can get a calorie-laden snack that may be somewhat quasi-healthy (think Grilled Chicken Burrito, or ½-pound Cheesy Rice and Bean Burrito).

Went into the Port Angeles location.  Incredibly slow service.  Bad sign for a fast-food joint.  First cause, teenage rookie at the till with incredibly short attention span.  Second cause, manager who would break into idle conversation with short-attention-spanned rook while he was trying to take customer orders.  Third cause, finicky Port Angeleans with all sorts of crazy questions and ideas about what they should expect at a cookie cutter burritorium.  “What’s in a bean burrito?”  “Can I get a bean burrito, but I’d like to add chicken to it?”  “I’d like the Grilled Chicken Burrito, but please hold the rice.”  Fourth cause, attempt to personalize the formican glare of the Taco Bell experience by taking down everyone’s name as they place their order, rather than just issue them a number as their cash register is wont to do.  (Here’s short-attention-spanned teenager trying to ask names, remember them, write them down, reassociate them with their number as the order actually comes up, and then mispronounce them to the delight and disinterest of every diner.)

My favorite customer was a slightly overweight woman using a cane (which one felt she had as more of a prop than an actual implement of stabilization…..especially when she completely put it to one side as she sampled and poured out and resampled each of the offered fountain drinks).  “I don’t want anything spicy.  I cannot have anything spicy.  What do you have which doesn’t have anything spicy in it?”  (Which begs the question, “why Taco Bell?”)  After deciding on her order, she ambled over to the condiment display and stuffed her purse full–literally, stuffed full–with packets of Fire Sauce.

What?!

As Maxx suggests, maybe she is a criminal mastermind, establishing her alibi.